In my quest for greater existential knowledge and higher understanding I have taken to reading the ingredients notice on everyday products laying about my house.
This pastime is not for the fainthearted. Since I embarked on this journey of discovery I have turned into a psycho-paranoid wreck; I have developed facial twitches, uncontrolled trembling and severe abdominal cramps associated with sporadic explosive diarrhoea. I have nightmares, hallucinations and I have also developed a pronounce stammer.
You find the darndest things added to your favourite food, shampoo or wet wipe.
Putting your hand into your refrigerator, grocery cupboard or even your bathroom cabinet is like reaching blindfolded into Sadam’s chemical weapons stash. Some ingredients are so toxic that I am surprised that the containers are able to resist. Others would make Monsanto’s R&D chief tremble with fear.
And we happily put these noxious things onto and into our bodies.
Before my last functioning neurones were irretrievably lost to this madness, I decided to understand why we readily give our hard earned disposable income to the purveyors of mass destruction, otherwise collectively known as the agroindustry.
My research inevitably led me to Farcebook; that intellectual wasteland and infinite repository of useless information.
Some guy named Pennycook (I kid you not) from Waterloo University (you can’t make this shit up) has become famous for his research into why some, read most, people believe in pseudo profound bullshit. Translated into English it simply refers to those little inspirational messages that pollute Farcebook and other scrotal media.
At first I did not see the link with product ingredient notices, but armed with perseverance and intense belief in my mission, I continued to read his article. After many a sleepless night, it slowly dawned on me; there is a cause and effect relationship between them. Agro-industrial products filled with toxic ingredients causes chronic and irreversible neuronal degeneration which results in decreased intellectual proficiency. The inflicted then turn to the production or sharing of pseudo profound bullshit on scrotal media.
Through the spread of pseudo profound bullshit the cognitively challenged masses become ripe for all sorts of abuse. And if there is one predator that has the specialist ability to infiltrate the spongiform remnants of brain-matter in humans it is marketing - otherwise aptly known as collective brainwashing.
Armed with marketing, you can sell anything.
Marketing and selling rely on that mysterious but indispensable component called strategy, and strategy in turn relies on that other smoke and mirrors profession, Statistics.
There are many cogs in the wheel of consumer bliss.
Contrary to popular and scientific belief, marketing is not based on high moral principles or concern for the consumer well-being. That is why it is so widely used by politicians.
Thanks to incessant use, marketing has become an involuntary natural human reflex, like breathing or projectile vomiting. Marketing works by first supressing rational thought and then creating a warm fuzzy feeling in the residues of the human brain, which in turn stimulates an irresistible urge to acquire something. Or in the case of religion, political promises and pseudo profound bullshit, the irresistible compulsion to believe.
Agroindustry’s sole purpose is to make money. Not surprisingly they use marketing to achieve their objectives. And they are so single-mindedly focused on success that they have convinced the politicians - those upright pillars of virtue, guardians of our health, wealth and happiness - that it is acceptable to put dangerous chemicals in food and in health products.
Agroindustry marketing has resulted in absurd, irrational and downright bizarre behaviour.
A woman would rather pour toxic waste from a bottle adorned with a picture of an avocado, than to actually rub a real avocado freshly picked from a tree on her head. Mothers will plaster cream from a tube containing poisonous substances on new born babies ….. because marketing said so.
And marketing said so because statistics prove that this is what consumers really, really deep down in the depths of their collective beings want more than anything else.
Marketing, by its very nature is designed to compel one to consume more and more.
And when you lay in your hospital bed contemplating the chances of surviving over indulgence of your last ready-cooked meal laced with legally introduced poison, all your Farcebook friends will send you pseudo profound bullshit in the form of prayers and inspirational messages.
And here is a message for those of low cognitive availability; don’t go thinking that BIO is the solution either. BIO suffers from marketing as well. Just as all roads lead to Rome, all products bought in a commercial environment came from the entrails of the agroindustry.
There is no salvation in sight. Marketing induced neuronal degeneration has spread faster than an Aids virus in a Nigerian brothel. With political permission, banking collusion and good old fashioned greed, the agroindustry keeps adding more toxic chemicals to our products. And all we can do is send each other pseudo profound bullshit in the form of prayers and inspirational messages on Farcebook.
Next time I see that my BIO butter contains apparently harmless Hexopathermethylohydrosulfurouslactate I will be secure in the knowledge that statistically it is what I desire and that because I want it, it is good for me.